Fulghum, R. (1986). All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten. Villard Books

In this collection of short essays Robert Fulghum distils essential life lessons from simple childhood experiences. He emphasises fundamental values such as sharing, kindness, honesty, and responsibility, which are often overlooked in adulthood. Fulghum argues that the principles learned in kindergarten—like treating others with respect, playing fair, and taking care of oneself and others—are crucial for navigating the complexities of life. Through anecdotes and reflections, he illustrates how these basic truths can guide personal and professional relationships, promoting a more compassionate and connected world. Ultimately, Fulghum reminds readers that the simplicity of childhood wisdom can lead to profound insights and a fulfilling life.

Everything I Needed to Know I Learned Without Kindergarten

Growing up in apartheid-era South Africa, the concept of kindergarten was entirely alien to me. Opportunities were scarce, and formal education was riddled with barriers.  Ironically, I had never attended kindergarten, Fulghum’s wisdom has served as a guiding light throughout my life and career. He shares essential life principles in a manner that is both accessible and profound. One lesson, “Share everything,” initially became my moral compass in the competitive business landscape. By fostering a culture of collaboration and transparency, I witnessed firsthand how these values led to greater outcomes and an environment rooted in trust.

His reminder to “Say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody” was equally important. In leadership, mistakes are an inevitable part of the journey, and offering a sincere apology is a testament to strength and integrity. Each apology reinforced our values of kindness and respect, creating a more cohesive team dynamic.

Though I never stepped foot in a kindergarten classroom, I grasped the critical importance of accountability. Growing up under apartheid, I witnessed the consequences of evading responsibility. I made a personal vow to own my missteps and inspire others to do the same, to foster a culture that encourages calculated risk-taking and personal growth.

Fulghum’s advice, “When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together,” serves as a reminder that life—and leadership—are inherently communal journeys. Teams thrive through collaboration.

Another of Fulghum’s insights that resonates with me is the celebration of wonder and curiosity: “Be aware of wonder. Live a balanced life—learn some, think some, draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.” On my journey of reclaiming my identity and pursuing a more authentic life, I returned to this principle I had internalised many years before. It is a reminder of how we can quickly lose ourselves in the hustle of daily life.

Looking back, I can see that the essence of Fulghum’s lessons was already woven into the fabric of my upbringing. Growing up in a community that valued connection and resilience instilled a deep appreciation for kindness and responsibility. However, I also recognised that these ideals did not always translate into actionable behaviours, particularly for people of colour. My fears of failure often overshadowed my leadership principles for many years.

Reflecting on my journey, it is clear how early experiences shaped my understanding of what it means to be a leader. Authentic leadership is about uplifting others and creating an environment where everyone can thrive.

Fulghum’s insights and my life experiences have led me to conclude that the simplest truths often lead to the most growth. Kindness, humility, and authenticity are the cornerstones of effective leadership. As I navigate the complexities of life today, I continue to strive to create spaces where empathy and collaboration flourish—where diverse voices are heard and valued. It is not merely about reaching the destination but how we journey together, celebrating the wonder of our shared humanity.

The wisdom I found in Fulghum’s teachings about sharing, kindness, and accountability became part of my moral compass and made me a better leader. He shaped my convictions that:

• Collaboration and transparency lead to better outcomes in business.

• Apologising for mistakes reinforces accountability and improves team dynamics.

• Leadership is about uplifting others and fostering a supportive environment where empathy and collaboration thrive.

• Embracing wonder and curiosity may help you reconnect with your authentic self.

• True leadership is rooted in kindness, humility, and authenticity.